Okay so I know it is silly but I don't want to turn 35. I am not ready. 35 is MID. I am not ready for MID, it leads to late and I shudder to think what comes after THAT.
Alright I know what you are thinking... "Just the other day she was writting about how blessed she is!" I know, and it is all still true. I can't explain this panic in any logical way, the is nothing resonable behind it. My best rational thought is that is is tied in with the fact that my mom died in her early 40's which means at this age she was in the last decade of her life. I am SOOOO not ready for that. Oh yeah, I have worst death issues. If I were smart I would go see a therapist and get some help, nay some relief from this slow torture. I don't want to spend every day afraid to live because I might die. I dunno folks. I think maybe I am just a spazz.
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