rant...

The great conundrum of being a prospective adoptive parent is that you want to get ready, you want to have some level of preparedness but it is almost impossible. I have a crib in storage as well as a play pen and a baby monitor but I don't know if I will ever need them. I have a bed and I am looking for a bunk bed but I don't know if it will just be a colossal waste of money. We might not be approved. I mean really, we might not. I can't understand why we might be denied, but I have to emotionally prepare for the possibility that it could happen. How do that? How do I get excited and make preparations and all the while remain emotionally detached? I don't know if I have that in me. So far I have been pretty cool about the whole thing.