Some thoughts on permanence

Permanence... it is a HOT word in the field a foster and adoption care. A buzz word grouped with so many others like reunification, concurrent planning or transition. But like so many words when you start batting it around over and over it starts to lose its meaning, it becomes this abstract concept, like when you say tree 100 times and it ceases to have any significant meaning.
The ultimate goal of adoption is permanence and has a special place in my heart; it a large part of why adoption is so appealing to me in the first place. I can tell you first hand the importance of permanence and stability in the life of a child. From the moment I was born there was no stability in my life. I try extra hard not to sound bitter when I talk about it but it is hard, especially for people who don't know me well. I have only lived one life so for me it is "normal", it is what I know, what I have grown comfortable with. Unfortunately that means I accept or worse anticipate that people who I love and who are supposed to love me will just up and leave; that I will be moved; that circumstances are almost always beyond my control; and the no matter how much a person loves you they can hurt you.
Gil and I have been together for six and a half years now and despite some moves and job changes things have been very stable for me. This has give me the time and strength to work on overcoming the challenges that years and years of instability have left in their wake. We have a home now and it our permanent home base, this is the ultimate win for me.
I have always envied my peers who have had a home and family to always go back to even if just for the holidays or to do laundry. A parent to call for a special recipe or to bounce an idea off of. A room or a house or a neighbourhood that says "I'm home".
One of my greatest goals as a parent is to provide that for my child and especially for a child who has already had so much upheaval in their life. I want Gil and I to mean home and safety to someone else as we do now for each other.